Evil Nintendo Wii Feasting on Souls of Elderly
The Wii has been a smashing success and the minds of the elderly who play Wii have never been more like the jello they eat. As Nintendo gradually lost they're iron grip over the minds and souls of teenagers, they set out find new markets where they can market 120 minute commercials, like 1987's The Wizard, without fear of skepticism or independent thought. more...

Alice Cooper Still Hanging Around Staples
Not realizing appearing in a Staples commercial was a temporary deal, Alice Cooper is still hanging around a Staples located in a suburban southern California town. The store employees mostly ignore Alice and most customers don't notice him. more...

Lucky the Leprechaun Busted for Lucky Charms
Lucky, the charismatic leprechaun who made Lucky Charms one of the tastiest cereals of all time was arrested after police noticed his house was overflowing with Lucky Charm marshmallows. more...

Penguins Lurking, Creating Mayhem
When the penguins stopped pillaging and marauding the world breathed a sigh of relief. All that changed at the beginning of 2009. It didn't take long for the relative peace and quiet the world had come to appreciate since penguins ceased major operations years ago to quickly vanish. more...

If Cats Could Talk
Your children are not attractive or intelligent. After being forced to eat out of a can for my entire life I look forward to seeing the look on your face when you realize the most important people in your life work at Taco Bell. You're daughter is slowly growing a mustache too. I've been watching it come in for years. more...

Abercrombie Employee's Cries for Help Silenced
It's really been All-American lifestyle for Chad Johnson, an upper class college student, who's cries for help were muffled by Abercrombie's in-store playlist blasting loud enough to deter sensible consumers from all walks of life. more...

Angry Penguin Leading Moral Majority
The Moral Majority accidentally appointed none other than a very angry Penguin head of it's organization last week. The Penguin, only referred to as "The Chosen One" has made it a point to physically attack anybody that thinks differently than he does. more...

Megaman 3 Bosses - Whom we weep for
Megaman 3 was just better than the first two and leaps and bounds better than the successors. By the fifth game it was just "strange" and the first game was didn't have the slide. Number three is the sweet spot! more...

Megaman 1 Bosses - ALL of them
Megaman 1 was filled with great bosses, which will be poked fun later on. I'd like to explain to everybody that after you have become accustomed to sliding in the third incarnation of Megaman, there is no going back to just jumping around. more...